10 points for scooby!
should have made it clear that i only hooked up dads battery to mine by jumper leads.
put dads battery in an hour ago and she started up beautifully, then transferred my dead one over, and i've left the car running for the last hour. will shower and drive out to the battery shop, see what they think - yes sir, it's dead, well not completely, but it's christmas, and i need money, so buy this new lovely battery.
thanks for all the help everyone!
oh, and i drove the car a mere 15m from the yard into the driveway, it was like driving a car for the first time, having gone so long without. should take it slowly today