Mr Eps

Imagine everyone from your work goes out to a business lunch and your left behind by yourself to man the phones. They get back to work to find u filthy blackout dancing to dirty dubstep beats that are playing through your tinny iphone speaker.. kraftwerk songs / pendulum. Drool is escaping your lips as you squirm vigorously around the room, jumping on desks. Then you scream out "Im going to Paramount!!!!" You continue dancing as you exit the room. Everyone is just looking at you in disbelief, wondering wtf happened to you. You push the button on the elevator, whilst continuing to dance in the same spot. Eventually the door opens and your facing a really packed elevator. Faces are staring at you. You know there is absolutely no room for you but you run and leap forward landing on top of a few startled people as the elevator doors close behind you. You somehow work your feet to the floor and get your balance, then as everyone's judging you in disgust for what you just did, you start rubbing your hands through your hair and start making moaning noises like your in absolute euphoria. A middle aged lady tell you "you disgust me, how dare you act like this in public!" to which you reply "OI YOUGOIN TOFUTUREMUSICMAN?????" The lift finally reaches the bottom, but just before your out you reach into your bag and pull out a Jim Beam black can, Everyone in the lift shifts uncomfortably and starts murmuring at you drinking alcohol. You stab the can with your keys, and sub the jim beam down in under 8 seconds. You burp loudly and blow it in the direction of some hot chick. You slam the can down on the ground as hard as you can and scream "Hell yeah, Wooo!!!" (the can bounces back and cuts open someone’s eyelid), but you don’t see this because your too busy breathing really hard and repeatedly pushing "door open, door open." The elevator doors open, and the last thing the others see is you sprinting out as fast as you can barking loudly at randoms. …Stay tuned for part 2: THE NIGHT OUT!! PART 2: After leaving work and having that "incident" in the elevator, the elevator doors open.. Your free!! You run out of the building, whilst still continuing to dance. Your hands are fist pumping and arms are doing all those weird crazy movements that you do when you dance in private in front of the mirror. You get to your car knowing you should not be driving, but screw it its Wednesday and you gotta get to paramount coz EVERYONE KNOWS its the best night of the week to be there. You go to turn on your ignition and suddenly realise your sitting in the passenger seat and you've opened the front compartment instead. Woops! You get out, and bonnet slide across to the other side, and this time start your ignition for real. Knowing you shouldn't be driving on main roads you decide to take the quiet backstreets home.. .. 1 minute later you’re on Alexander drive caning it at like 150. Just before you reach your suburb you think to yourself screw it I haven’t done a burnout for a while so you decide u have to lay a strip outside the entrance of morley sport and rec centre. i mean not on the road but on the actual pavement where ppl wait outside and chat. So you get there and you reverse all the way to the entrance. then you just sit there roasting it, cranking music as loud as u can, with your sunglasses on. then slowly release and creep forward onto the bitumen. By this stage smoke is everywhere, ppl are coughing, old ladies are staring at you with disgust. Management is stepping outside to see what all the noise and commotion is about. This whole time your redlining, and thick white smoke is just gunning out of those tyres, you creep forward a little more and then start whipping nuts in front of the bus bays, narrowly missing kids as they leave their junior karate lessons. Their parents yelling obscenities out like "what an idiot" "theres children around." and "who do you think you are". You suddenly stop and get out of your car. People can hardly see you, because theres a white cloud surrounding the car. You sit on your bonnet and fire up a dart, bringing your arm up quickly to inhale the smoke, then bringing it down quickly, but keeping both arms in the typical milkcrate position, like a hero. Your car is just in the middle of the road blocking traffic on both sides. Cars start pulling into the rec centre but just get banked up because your in the way. One guy, lets call him Paul Deocampo, starts beeping "oi mate, cmon move your car its blocking the way i wanna get inside and work my traps ay". You turn your head and flick you lit cigarette at his windscreen, ash and sparks fly all over his car. then you look at him and shout loud enough to scare everyone around you, "WHAT C _ _ _ !!" You then get back inside your vehicle, start reving it loud, and accelerate is as fast as you can out of morley rec not stopping or even looking as your exiting. You just cane it down the road gnashing your teeth. Everyone at the front of morley rec can hear your engine thrashing it down the road, with bass pumping from the extremely loud trance your cranking. At home you get changed into these dirty denim shorts, and an adidas tennis hat, and now your dressed right for paramount! Then you start sinking some of your parents alcohol, whatevers around. ..which happens to be your mums cooking brandy, mostly.. The next few hours are a total blur and then you realise its 2:30am and your in the line to get into Rise. Hell yeah! Your in line waiting, its 13 degrees outside, but you are sweating furiously, and chatting hard to whoever is willing to listen, which is, nobody. You get inside and spend most of your night hanging out on the balcony associating with the unfavourable types. After meeting this one bloke called Derek, you suddenly realise you two have a lot in common. ..Mostly amphetamines. After a while you look at your phone and its 5:20am, so you walk back in the venue and theres just staff there cleaning up. You’re the only patron left in the whole of Rise, everyone else has gone home. The manager comes up to you and says “seriously WTF are you doing here, I told you plenty of times that your banned from this place, now get OUT!!” You leave with a smile on your face knowing that in a few days time you’ll be back inside having the time of your life, again. You and Derek go to the cas. The end.

Watch your mouth I start djing at the queens soon haha. Middle finger to the hatersssssss

No dont

Holy balls they look nice

hmm - nah sorry guys i'm with nic on this one... this would explain my cefiro DE+T setup how i was on full boost at like... 0.000001 of an RPM lol Nic knows what i'm talking about... his whole face lit up. hahah

LOL!!!!

it's the ones that know how to party @ amplifier bar that are worth keeping hold of ;-)

to give you a better idea of what i mean by "chrome work" - I'm getting the same garnish along the bottom of my doors... ^^^like that

haha - it's a chrome sticker, soooooo think vinyl graphics but not as crappy it actually has a layer of metal there... but yeah - it will be "like" pinstriping i guess.. mine is a series 3 single turbo model - i guess that's what i like about the soarer.. is that for every "good one" that you see.. you'll see about 20 other crap ones that should be burned mine has T's project bodykit.. and work wheels - so it's a snob's soarer

=) i'm getting some chroming work (not really... but chrome-ish work) done this week.. you'll see pics once it's done! so there's another idea - chrome your side skirts.. in the interim.. BUY THESE FROM JAPAN!!!!!! nice and bold yet conservative offsets and widths

didn't know that ta. getting some chrome work done this week... decided it needs moar body mods will be getting a head unit and exhaust in the new year... - yep that's right... i'm still kicking around with a 2.5 DIN sized hole in my interior

was it stolen or something?

This date sounds like my Wednesday night story unfolding Ps... "Thursday" (part 2) is coming shortly.

Haha yeah bit of a shame, easy fix though... And talk to aaron about price!! But yeah.. If I may be so bold I reckon be like me and get work schwert they are a versatile styled wheel... Either that or some work emotions but as I said.. I'm not a fan of body kits on modern cars.. They don't need them and these days generally cars are sportier styled from factory ... You can always colour code your bumpers though!!

yeah it's 17's for brake clearance - but at present moment i think it's sorted - GOD i love SAU

can i borrow / rent the enkei's in the interim paul??? or - open offer - needed to rent / borrow / possibly BUY a set OR pair of 5x114.3 MINIMUM of 17in no driving to be done - just needed to push a car around for a few weeks... =)

lol no. and a lip kit (i think) would look shocking... new cars dont NEED bodykits... get some lowering springs and you'll look a hell of a lot better than some lame plastic bodykit... as for wheels - don't be a sissy! get THESE.

...just mask it carefully *up to* the rubber seal the put vaseline on the rubber seal? and paint? profit??

there's something in the bong water over there in queensland

and Zeb - talk to aaron... ...get front cut from him? if you can't find one... get one from a supra!!! ....ya know... for teh 2j!

lol - they're cropped out of the photo bruu they're in the background with the following things: baggy polo shirts - the bottom half is dark blue, the top half is hi-vis orange cargo shorts. with pockets. EVERYWHERE. oakley bug eye sunnies. and desert boots. and they're standing around smoking darts. not saying a word. ...i was watching police ten 7 lastnight - the NZ version of cops. that show is hilarious. seriously to me that show is champagne comedy. what OTHER show on tele can you see some d1ckhead steal a Cefiro, try to run from a police helicopter, get attacked by a dog, taken down, THEN beat up a cop??? what other show can you see a bunch of 16 year old maori gang go from stabbing other gang members to being taken to the cop shop after spitting, punching, swearing at and kicking police officers, to be taken into custody... ...only to see their parents come in and beat the living sh1t out of their kids on TV... it's hilarious!!!!

...dibbs on dresing as daisy dukes. ...nah im just kidding. i already have plans of being passed out face down in a storm drain somewhere.

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhmmm try autopro in malaga?? they tend to carry that sort of boutique thing.. Phone: 08 9249 4288 if not afraid to buy 2nd hand - try KYP

sorry i took so long i was out and about... OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH see what i did there??? yup... THERE GOES YOUR THEORUM. to answer you properly... no... .. ...no i don't.

no. marlin - LOL!!! thermonuclear burn! and other guy - (i tried to remember name) my mum used to have a 92 TT soarer - those gearboxes lag terribly compared to the vvti... the early models "sludge" through their gears, the vvti really SNAPS but it's a movement that you don't really notice.. like it just sorta clicks through effortlessly.. that said, it's mostly the same gearbox.. so i would suggest check the trans fluid.. a common mistake that many mechanics will make is use dexron III in the soarers because "thats what the manual says" however that's specific to the V8 i beleive... the twin turbos require a TTF fluid - without it they kinda spaz out in a bad way. but also she should / you should do an ECU reset for her and make sure you reset the trans ECU while you're at it.. it will / should drive like a dream after that.. but if the gearbox is driving like a dog then it could be a number of things - these two suggestions are the most common issues that the trans will have though