If you don't laugh out loud after you read this you are in a coma! This is
even funnier when you realize it's real! Next time you have a bad day at
work think of this guy…
Bob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana . He
performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs.
Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister.
She then sent it to radio station 103 .5 on FM dial in Indiana, who was
sponsoring a worst job experience contest.
Needless to say, she won.
Read his letter below...
Hi Sue,
Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a bad
day at the office.
I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share
my dilemma with you, to make you realize it's not so bad after all.
Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few
technicalities of my job.
As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea.
I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit. This time of year the water
is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered
industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out
of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down
to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now
this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it
several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and
start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit.
This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.
Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch. So,
of course, I scratched it.
This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my ass started to burn.
I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done. In agony I
realized what had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish
and pumped it into my suit. Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the
jellyfish couldn't stick to it, however, the crack of my ass was not as
fortunate. When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding
the jellyfish into the crack of my ass. I informed the dive supervisor of
my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the
fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically.
Needless to say, I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make three
agonizing in-water decompression stops totalling thirty-five minutes before I
could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression.
When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet.
As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running
down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as
soon as I got in the chamber.
The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't shit for two days because my ass
was swollen shut.
So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse
it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your ass. Now repeat to
yourself, 'I love my job, I love my job, I love my job.'
Whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a jellyfish bad day? May
you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!!!
~Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.~