race_snooze

Jayce I am willing to give it a crack for you mate. Good at setting up random Plasma and LCD stuff well normally. When I head over to Jarra tomorrow ill give u and E a buz and head over early if all goes to plan. Dont worry about the drop thats of course it works lol...

Well this is well kind of crap not a single bite this whole time. What do I have to do to sell it. I really dont think its over priced. Maybe Carpoint might be able to help.

Language warning so you youngens dont click.... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1dmVU08zVpA

head into jarra then turn left at the round about right at the servo then right again, and if you cant see the pub by now well...

ANOTHER NOVEL THOUGHT Regardless of where you stand on the issue of the U.S. Involvement in Iraq, here's a sobering statistic. There has been a monthly average of 160,000 troops in the Iraq theatre of operations during the last 22 months, and a total of 2,867 deaths. That gives a firearm death rate of 60 per 100,000 soldiers. The firearm death rate in Washington D.C. Is 80.6 per 100,000 persons for the same period. That means that you are about 25% more likely to be shot and killed in the U.S. Capital than you are in Iraq. Conclusion: The U.S. Should pull out of Washington

grats Leshy!!! shit luck about the car.

Think Ill even try for this one... just no line though still no rego...

From IF WOMEN DRINK THESE DRINKS IN A PUB ... (not at home) Beer Personality: Casual, low maintenance; down to earth. Approach: Challenge her to a game of pool. Cocktails or Blender drinks with umbrella Personality: Flaky, annoying, dizzy, and a pain in the ass. Approach: Avoid her, unless you want to be her cabin boy. Mixed drinks - no umbrellas e.g.; Gin and tonic / Scotch and soda Personality: Mature, has picky taste; knows what she wants Approach: If she wants you, she'll send YOU a drink. Water Personality:Pretentious and is looking for a serious relationship. Approach: Don't. Wine - (bottled, not 4 litre cask) Personality: Conservative and classy, sophisticated. Approach: Try and weave Paris and clothing into the conversation. Bacardi Breezer, Red Square, Archers Cooler, Smirnoff Ice, Mudshake etc. Personality: Easy; thinks she is trendy and sophisticated actually has no clue. Approach: Make her feel smarter than she is... and you're in. Spirits such as CC, Wild the sphincter of the universe, Southern Comfort Personality: Watch out, they are unique! A real mixture of personalities. Love to be laid! Approach:Talk dirty to them whilst challenging them intellectually - you're in! Cape Velvet Personality:Annoying voice, bit of a tart. Approach:Stand close and mention the alley next to the pub. Shots and Slammers (Tequila, Vodka, Cowboys, Aftershock etc.) Personality: Hangs around with male work pals or looking to get drunk. Approach:Easiest hit in the pub, Nothing to do but wait...... Spirits such as JACKS, BEAM & BUNDY Personality:Enjoys male company more than females, loves to party hard Approach:Keep buying them drinks, they'll think you're a nice bloke and they are probably trying to work out how to get you to bed! IF MEN DRINK IN A PUB.. (as always, very simple and clear cut.) Cider He's probably under-aged and wants to get laid. Cheap Domestic Beer He's poor / student and wants to get laid. Crown Lager Beer He likes good beer and wants to get laid. Imported Beer He's old; he likes good beer and wants to get laid. Guinness The man is a rapist and will get laid one way or another. Water He just threw up and is trying to wash the taste out of his mouth so that he can still get laid Wine He's hoping that the wine thing will give him a sophisticated image and help him get laid. Vodka or Brandy Extremely horny hound, would shag a warm scarf. Desperate to get laid. Port Thinks he's sophisticated, secretly likes men and wants to get laid. Whisky/Jack Daniels He doesn't give two $hits about anything and will hit anyone who will get in his way of getting laid. Jim Beam Not as masculine as the whisky drinker, knows all about feminine activities (knitting, crochet etc.) to weasel himself into getting laid. Rum or Tequila Likes fighting almost as much as getting laid. Bacardi Breezer, Red Square, Archers Cooler, Smirnoff Ice, etc He's gay (blatantly) - don't turn your back or pick up any dropped change.

Whats the most confusing day in Queanbeyan? * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Fathers day

BRITISH HUMOUR. The train was quite crowded, so a U.S. Marine walked the entire length looking for a seat, but the only seat left was taken by a well dressed, middle aged, French woman’s poodle. The war weary Marine asked, ”Ma’am, may I have that seat?” The French woman just sniffed and said to no one in particular, “Americans are so rude. My little Fifi is using that seat.” The Marine walked the entire train again, but the only seat left was under that dog. “Please, ma’am. May I sit down? I’m very tired.” She snorted, “Not only are you Americans rude, you are also arrogant!” This time the Marine didn’t say a word; he just picked up the little dog, tossed it out of the window, and sat down. The woman shrieked, “Someone must defend my honour! Put this American in his place!” An English gentleman sitting nearby spoke up, “Sir, you Americans often seem to have a penchant for doing the wrong thing. You hold the fork in the wrong hand. You drive your autos on the wrong side of the road. And now sir, you seem to have thrown the wrong bitch out of the window!”

they made up my turbo lines for me, pretty good job too and wasnt that expensive for high temp Teflon and braided sock thing.

enzed in fyshwick good guys can make just about any thing up.

It would only be Beau and you should be use that that by now.

good stuff Leigh!!!!

Note to self: 'cancel credit cards prior to death!' Be sure and cancel your credit cards before you die! This is so priceless and so easy to see happening - customer service, being what it is today! A lady died this past January, and ANZ bank billed her for February and March for their annual service charges on her credit card, and then added late fees and interest on the monthly charge. The balance had been $0.00, now is somewhere around $60.00. A family member placed a call to ANZ: Family Member: "I am calling to tell you that she died in January." ANZ: "The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply." Family Member: "Maybe, you should turn it over to collections." ANZ: "Since it is two months past due, it already has been." Family Member: So, what will they do when they find out she is dead?" ANZ: "Either report her account to the frauds division or report her to the credit bureau, maybe both!" Family Member: "Do you think God will be mad at her?" ANZ: "Excuse me?" Family Member: "Did you just get what I was telling you . . . the part about her being dead?" ANZ: "Sir, you'll have to speak to my supervisor." Supervisor gets on the phone: Family Member: "I'm calling to tell you, she died in January." ANZ: "The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply." Family Member: "You mean you want to collect from her estate?" ANZ: (Stammer) "Are you her lawyer?" Family Member: "No, I'm her great nephew." (Lawyer info given) ANZ: "Could you fax us a certificate of death?" Family Member: "Sure." (fax number is given) After they get the fax: ANZ: "Our system just isn't set up for death. I don't know what more I can do to help." Family Member: "Well, if you figure it out, great! If not, you could just keep billing her. I don't think she will care." ANZ: "Well, the late fees and charges do still apply." Family Member: "Would you like her new billing address?" ANZ: "That might help." Family Member: "Rookwood Memorial Cemetery, 1249 Centenary Rd, Sydney Plot Number 69." ANZ: "Sir, that's a cemetery!" Family Member: "What do you do with dead people on your planet?" an old one but still funny...

Fererdo's on mine as well... Can bring the oil light on with some hard braking

the place looks a little um close to home....

The Flight Crew The airliner pushed back from the gate, the flight attendant gave the passengers the usual information regarding seat belts, etc . Finally, she said, "Now sit back and enjoy your trip while your captain, Judith Campbell, and crew take you safely to your destination." Ed sitting in the eighth row thought to himself, "Did I hear her right? Is the captain a woman?" When the attendants came by with the drink cart, he said "Did I understand you right? Is the captain a woman?" "Yes," said the attendant, "In fact, this entire crew is female." "My God," said Ed, "I'd better have two scotch and sodas. I don't know what to think with only women up there in the cockpit." "That's another thing sir," said the attendant, "We No Longer Call It The Cock Pit." "It's The Box Office." I am sorry guys I have nothing today.... will try harder next week.

sorry guys, hopefully ill find something better today for you guys

Phone rings. GREEK MOTHER picks up the phone and answers: Greek Mother: Hello? Daughter: Hi Mom. Can I leave the kids with you tonight? Greek Mother: You're going out? Daughter: Yes. Greek Mother: With whom? Daughter: With a friend. Greek Mother: I don't know why you left your husband. He is such a good man. Daughter: I didn't leave him. He left me! Greek Mother: You let him leave you, and now you go out with anybodies and nobodies. Daughter: I do not go out with anybody. Can I bring over the kids? Greek Mother : I never left you to go out with anybody except your father. Daughter: There are lots of things that you did and I don't. Greek Mother : What are you hinting at? Daughter: Nothing. I just want to know if I can bring the kids over tonight. Greek Mother: You're going to stay the night with him? What will your husband say if he finds out? Daughter: My EX husband. I don't think he would be bothered. From the day he left me, he probably never slept alone! Greek Mother: So you're going to sleep over at this loser's place? Daughter: He's not a loser. Greek Mother: A man who goes out with a divorced woman with children is a loser and a parasite. Daughter: I don't want to argue. Should I bring over the kids or not? Greek Mother: Poor children with such a mother. Daughter: Such a what? Greek Mother : With no stability. No wonder your husband left you. Daughter: ENOUGH !!! Greek Mother: Don't scream at me. You probably scream at this loser too! Daughter: Now you're worried about the loser? Greek Mother: Ah, so you see he's a loser. I spotted him immediately. Daughter: Goodbye mother. Greek Mother: Wait! Don't hang up! When are you bringing them over? Daughter: I'm not bringing them over! I'm not going out! Greek Mother: If you never go out, how do you expect to meet anyone?

I was lucky my place didnt required that I pay stamp duty, Got in in December just before it became real hard to buy.

>1) I saw a large woman wearing a sweatshirt with 'Guess' on it. I said "Thyroid >Problem?" > >2) When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I >realised that The son of rajab doesn't work that way, so I stole one and asked him >to forgive me. > >3) I've often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife to go >swimming. > >4) I was doing some decorating, so I got out my step-ladder. I don't get on >with my real ladder. > >5) I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time'. So I ordered >French Toast during the Renaissance. > >6) A cement mixer collided with a prison van on the Kingston Bypass. >Motorists are asked to be on the lookout for 16 hardened criminals. > >7) Well I was bullied at school, called all kinds of different names. >But one day I turned to my bullies and said 'Sticks and stones may break my >bones but names will never hurt me', and it worked! >From there on it was sticks and stones all the way. > >8) My Dad used to say 'always fight fire with fire', which is probably why >he got thrown out of the fire brigade. > >9) Sex is like bridge: If you don't have a good partner, you better have a >good hand. > >10) I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. >My neighbour said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, six should be >enough.' > >11) If we aren't supposed to eat animals, then why are they made out of >meat? > >12) I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give >the wrong answers. > >13) You know that look women get when they want sex? No, me neither. > >14) Politicians are wonderful people as long as they stay away from things >they don't understand, such as working for a living. > >15) I was the kid next door's imaginary friend. > >16) Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I've >forgotten this before > >PETER KAY'S UNIVERSAL TRUTHS > >1) Triangular sandwiches taste better than square ones. > >2) At the end of every party there is always a girl crying. > >3) One of the most awkward things that can happen in a pub is when your >pint-to-toilet cycle gets synchronised with a complete stranger. > >4) Sharpening a pencil with a knife makes you feel really manly. > >5) You're never quite sure whether it's against the law or not to have a >fire in your back garden. > >6) Nobody ever dares make cup-a-soup in a bowl. > >7) You never know where to look when eating a banana. > >8) You always feel a bit scared when stroking horses. > >9) The smaller the monkey the more it looks like it would kill you at the >first given opportunity. > >10) Every bloke has at some stage while taking a pee, flushed half way >through and then raced against the flush. > >11) Its impossible to look cool whilst picking up a Frisbee. > >12) Driving through a tunnel makes you feel excited. > >13) Old ladies can eat more than you think. > >14) You can't respect a man who carries a dog. > >15) Despite constant warning, you have never met anybody who has had their >arm broken by a swan. > >16) You've turned into your dad the day you put aside a thin piece of wood >specifically to stir paint with. > >17) Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a >fruit salad. > >SOME GREAT QUESTIONS BROUGHT TO YOU BY PETER KAY > >1) Why does your gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed? > >2) If a person owns a piece of land do they own it all the way down to the >core of the earth? > >3) Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed? > >4) Is it possible to brush your teeth without wiggling your bottom? > >5) Why is it called Alcoholics Anonymous when the first thing you do is >stand up and say, 'My name is Peter and I am an alcoholic'? > >6) Why are they called stairs inside but steps outside? > >7) Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer? > >8) Why does mineral water that 'has trickled through mountains for >centuries' have a 'use by' date? > >9) Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible >crisp no one would eat? > >10) Is French kissing in France just called kissing? > >11) Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze >these dangly things here and drink whatever comes out'? > >12) What do people in China call their good quality plates? > >13) Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't >point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is? > >14) What do you call male ballerinas? > >15) Why is a person that handles your money called a 'Broker'? > >16) If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? > >17) If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from >vegetables, then what is baby oil made from? > >18) Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over a billion >stars in the universe, you believe them, but if they tell you there is wet >paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?

lol Leigh then you would have twice the amount of trouble

just found this and went damn, that would have great to replace the shity clapped out one in the ute.

The other thing you guys have that I dont is the two incomes which is making things a little difficult, maybe if I stop drinking mmmmm I would probably just go insane!!!!