Nice Jayce, I like...
A man walks into a bar... You think he would have ducked!
Q. What do you do if your dishwasher stops working?
A. Kick her in the ass!
Oops did I say that out loud?
There's a Wog, a Chinese man and an Australian man stranded on a desert island.
One day they find a lamp and out pops a Genie, the genie says "You have three wishes" so they each take one...
The Chinese man says first "I wish to be home in my own country with all of my fellow country men where can all live together in peace" WOOSH - He dissapears!
Then the Wog says "that sounds good, I wish for all of me fellow country men and me to be together in our home country and live forever in peace" WOOSH - He dissapears!
The Genie then looks at the white Australian man and says "I suppose you want the same thing too?"
The man says "Well... You mean to tell me that all of the Chinese and all of the Wogs are out of Australia?"
The Genie replies "Yes"
The Aussie thinks for moment and then says.... "Ill just have a coke then".
My apologies to any ethnic people out there, Im not racist, it just a joke!