Kero

I have finished loaded your PC up with porn so you can drop the videos off at my joint whenever you pick up your pc.... Cheers Mick

Yes its very ordinary.... and it has so many bugs in it. Do not be surprised that alot of people complain about it.

Two friends, a blonde and a redhead,are walking down the street and pass a flower shop where the redhead saw her boyfriend buying flowers. Redhead sighed and said, "Oh, crap, my boyfriend is buying me flowers again." The blonde looked quizzically at her and said, "You don't like getting flowers from your boyfriend?" The redhead said, "I love getting flowers, but he always has expectations after giving me flowers, and I just don't feel like spending the next three days on my back with my legs in the air." The blonde says, "Don't you have a vase?"

This will be it.... Monday 28th June: FOX Sport 1: 5:30 - 6:30 Speedweek Racing. A comprehensive round-up of motor sport, featuring drag racing, speedway, NASCAR, Indycar and Touring car action.

This tunnel is between Sweden and Denmark . Picture taken from the Swedish side.

Recent investigations have shown that children cannot identify the erotic scene. Their minds have not yet developed sufficiently. What they see are nine dolphins. However, the rest of the minds are sufficiently corrupt to make it extraordinarily difficult to spot the dolphins on the first try. If you find it difficult to see the dolphins within six seconds, it shows that the level of your mental erotic corruption is far above the recommended limit. Oh, I promise that there are 9 dolphins. The second image is there to highlight the dolphins however I could still not see any thing

And while im on a role.... Attached: Picture 1 - Is a picture of me and my first vehicle. Not much has changed we are still sharing track cars Picture 2 - Is my favorite. Me teaching Fatz how to scull KB - Kids Beer.

Been going through the good old family photo album. Though a few of you might enjoy this picture of Fatz and his first vehicle. Not much has changed It was taken back in September 1980 so he was about 15 months. Cheers Mick

7 little ducks went out one day... over the hill and far away...

(I love the second one... )

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS Smart man + smart woman = romance Smart man + dumb woman = affair Dumb man + smart woman = marriage Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy OFFICE ARITHMETIC Smart boss + smart employee = profit Smart boss + dumb employee = production Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime SHOPPING MATH A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need. GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. HAPPINESS To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all. LONGEVITY Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die. PROPENSITY TO CHANGE A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does. DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument. HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

One afternoon, a wealthy lawyer was riding in the back of his limousine when he saw two men eating grass by the road side. He ordered his driver to stop, and he got out to investigate. "Why are you eating grass?" he asked one man. "We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied. "Oh, well, you can come with me to my house," instructed the lawyer. "But, sir, I have a wife and two children with me!" "Bring them along!" replied the lawyer. He turned to the other man and said: "You come with us, too." "But I have a wife and six children," the second man answered. "Bring them as well" replied the lawyer. They all climbed into the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as large as the limousine. Once underway, one of the poor fellows said: "Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you. The lawyer replied: "Glad to do it. You'll love my place; the grass is almost a foot tall."

A little kid was sitting on the top of a flight of stairs and his mum was watching him. The kid had a bag of jelly beans. He put one in his mouth, grabbed the cat and bit it. Then dropped down to the next step, put another jelly bean in his mouth, bit the cat again and dropped down to the next step. His mum wondered what he was doing so went up and asked him. "I'm playing truckies" said the kid, "Poppin pills, eating pu$$y and movin' on."

Giorgio is in this country for about 6 months. He walks to work everyday and passes a shoe store. Each day he stops and looks in the window and admires a certain pair of Bocceli leather shoes. He wants those shoes so much it's all he can think about. After about 2 months he saves the $300.00 the shoes cost and purchases them. Every Friday night the Italian community gets together at a dance in the church basement, so Giorgio seizes the opportunity to wear his new Bocceli leather shoes to the dance. He asks Sophia to dance and as they dance he asks her, "Sophia,do you Wear red panties tonight?" Sophia, startled, says, "Yes, Giorgio, I do wear Red panties tonight, but how do you know?" Giorgio replies, "I see the reflection in my new $300.00 Bocceli leather shoes. How do you like them?" Next he asks Rosa to dance, and after a few minutes he says to her,"Rosa, do you wear white panties tonight?" Rosa answers, "Yes, Giorgio, I do, but how do you know that?" He answers, "I see the reflection in my new $300.00 Bocceli leather shoes. How do you like them?" Now as the evening is almost over and the last song is being played, Giorgio asks Carmella to dance. Midway through the dance his face turns red. He says, "Carmella, stilla my heart, please, please tell me you wear no panties tonight, please, please, tella me thisa true!" Carmella smiles coyly and answers, "Yes Giorgio, I wear no panties tonight." Giorgio gasps and says..."Thanka God...I thought I had a CRACK in my $300.00 Bocceli leather shoes.

A man and a woman were sitting beside each other in the first class section of the plane. The woman sneezed, took out a tissue,gently wiped her nose, and then shuddered quite violently for 10 or 15 seconds. The man went back to his reading. A few minutes later, the woman sneezed again, took a tissue, gently wiped her nose, and shuddered quite violently as before. The man was becoming more and more curious about the shuddering. A few more minutes passed and the woman sneezed one more time. Again, she took a tissue, gently wiped her nose, and shuddered violently. The man couldn't restrain his curiosity. He turned to the woman and said, "You've sneezed three times, wiped your nose with a tissue, then shuddered violently! Are you all right?" "I'm sorry if I disturbed you," the woman replied, "I have a rare condition; when I sneeze, I have an orgasm." The man was a little embarrassed but even more curious and said, "I've never heard of that before. What are you taking for it?" The woman looked at him and said, "Pepper."

A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she lay her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and said, 'I'm so sorry, your pet has passed away'. The distressed owner wailed, 'Are you sure?' 'Yes, I'm sure. The duck is dead,' he replied. 'How can you be so sure', she protested. 'I mean, you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something'. The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head. The vet patted the dog and took it out and returned a few moments later with a beautiful cat. The cat jumped up on the table and also sniffed the bird from its beak to its tail and back again. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly, jumped down and strolled out of the room. The vet looked at the woman and said, 'I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck.' Then the vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman. The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. '$150!' she cried. '$150 just to tell me my duck is dead?!!' The vet shrugged. 'I'm sorry. If you'd taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20. But what with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it all adds up!'

Plane Journey A man boarded an aircraft at Heathrow and took his seat. as he settled in, he noticed a very beautiful woman boarding the plane. He realised she was heading straight towards his seat and bingo! She took the seat right beside him. Eager to strike up a conversation, he blurted out ,"business trip or vacation?" She turned, smiled enchantingly and said "Business. I'm going to the annual nymphomaniac convention in the United States". He swallowed hard here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting for nymphomaniacs! Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, "What's your business role at this convention?" "Lecturer," she responded. "I use my experience to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality." "Really", he smiled, "what myths are those?" "Well," she explained, " one popular myth is that African American men are the most well endowed when, in fact, it's the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait another popular myth is that French men are the best lovers, when actually it is the men of Greek descent. We have also found that the best potential lovers in all categories are the Irish," Suddenly the woman became uncomfortable and blushed. "I'm sorry," she said, "I really shouldn't be discussing this with you, i don't even know your name." "Tonto," the man said... "Tonto Papadopoulos , but my friends call me Paddy."

Cat in the Hat

Do one brave thing a day...........

Northern Territory Etiquette GENERAL RULES 1. Never take a beer to a job interview. 2. Always identify people in your yard before shooting them. 3. It's tacky to take an esky to church 4. If you have to vacuum the bed, it's time to change the sheets. 5. Even if you're certain you're included in the will, it's rude to take the trailer to the funeral home. DINING OUT 1. When decanting wine from the box, tilt the paper cup and pour slowly so as not to bruise the wine. 2. If drinking directly from the bottle, hold it with only one hand. ENTERTAINING IN YOUR HOME 1. A centrepiece for the table should never be anything prepared by a taxidermist 2. Don't allow the dog to eat at the table, no matter how good his manners. PERSONAL HYGIENE 1. While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this should be done in private, using ones OWN Ute keys. 2. Even if you live alone, deodorant isn't a waste of money. 3. Use of toiletries can only delay bathing a few days. 4. Dirt and grease under the fingernails is a no-no, as it detracts from woman's jewellery and alters the taste of finger foods. DATING (outside the family) 1. Always offer to bait your date's hook, especially on the first date. 2. Be assertive. Let her know you're interested: "I've been wanting to go out with you since I read that stuff on the dunny door two years ago." 3. Establish with her parents what time she's expected back. Some will say 10:00 PM; others might say "Monday." If the latter is the answer, it's the man's responsibility to get her to school on time. THEATRE ETIQUETTE 1. Crying babies should be taken to the lobby and picked up after the movie ends. 2. Refrain from talking to characters on the screen. Tests have proven they can't hear you. WEDDINGS 1. Livestock is a poor choice for a wedding gift. 2. Kissing the bride for more than five seconds may get you shot. 3. For the groom, at least, rent a tux. A tracksuit with a cummerbund and a clean football jumper can create a tacky appearance. 4. Though uncomfortable, say "yes" to socks and shoes for the occasion. DRIVING ETIQUETTE 1. Dim your headlights for approaching vehicles, even if the gun's loaded and the roo's in sight. 2. When approaching a roundabout, the vehicle with the largest tyres doesn't always have the right of way. 3. Never tow another car using panty hose and duct tape. 4. When sending your wife down the road with a petrol can, it's impolite to ask her to also bring back beer.

1. Okay, okay, I take it back. Unf@ck you! 2. You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing? 3. Well, this day was a total waste of make-up. 4. Well, aren't we a bloody ray of sunshine. 5. Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after. 6. Do I look like a people person? 7. This isn't an office. It's HELL with fluorescent lighting. 8. I'm not crazy, I've just been in a very bad mood for 25 years. 9. Sarcasm is just one more service I offer. 10. Do they ever shut up on your planet? 11. Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven't gone to sleep yet. 12. Don't worry. I forgot your name too. 13. Wait....I'm trying to imagine you with a personality. 14. Chaos, panic and disorder...my work here is done. 15. You look like shit. Is that the style now? 16. Earth is full. Go home. 17. Aw, did I step on your poor little bitty ego? 18. I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert. 19. A hard-on doesn't count as personal growth. 20. You are depriving some village of an idiot. 21. If assholes could fly, this place would be an airport.

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