LTSJayce

G'day and welcome!

Little Johnny is sitting in biology class, when his teacher states the fact that only humans stutter, and no other animal in the world does. Johnny raises his hand and says. "You're wrong, Miss Finch!" "Really, would you mind telling us why that is Johnny?"replies the teacher. "Well, Miss Finch, the other day I was playing with my cat on the porch. The neighbors' Rottweiler came around the corner, and my cat went 'fffff! fffff! fffff!', and before he could say 'F*ck!', the dog ate him!"

Once upon a time there were two brothers. One brother was very mischievous, always getting into trouble. The other brother, however, was very good. He was always kind to animals, helped elderly neighbors, and led an exemplary life. As time went on, the brothers stayed in touch but were never close. The evil brother became a heavy drinker and a womanizer. The other brother was a devoted husband and father and supported many charities. One day the evil brother died. Then, after a few years, the good brother passed away. He went to heaven and was rewarded with a happy afterlife. One day he went to God and asked, "Where is my brother? He died before me, but I have not seen him here in heaven." God replied, "As you know, your brother led an evil life, so he is not spending eternity here in heaven. He has been sent elsewhere." "I'm sorry to hear that", the good brother replied. "But I do miss him and wish I could see him again." "You can see him if you wish", God said. "I will give you the power to gaze into hell." So the power was granted and the good brother gazed into hell. Before long he saw his brother sitting on a bench. In one arm he held a keg of beer, and in the other he cradled a gorgeous young blonde. The good brother turned to God and said, "I can't believe what I'm seeing. I have found my brother, and he has a keg of beer in one arm and a beautiful woman in the other. Surely, hell cannot be that bad." God explained. "Things are not always as they seem. The keg has a hole in it. The blonde doesn't."

Ditto that!

And I'm soooo there for Round 2!! Bring it on,you cockroaches!!

I watched an ant climb a blade of grass this morning. When he reached the top, his weight bent the blade down to the ground. Then, twisting his thorax with insectile precision, he grabbed hold of the next blade. In this manner, he traveled across the lawn, covering as much distance vertically as he did horizontally, which amused and delighted me. And then, all at once, I had what is sometimes called an "epiphany", a moment of heightened awareness in which everything becomes clear. Yes, hunched over that ant on my hands and knees, I suddenly knew what I had to do... Quit drinking before noon.

And the big day has come...and I'm stuck in freezing cold Can'tberra waiting to know how my fave' silver 32 is travelling at WSID. Any news?!?

PM sent

Spotted an R32(GTS-T,I think)leaving Belco' Mall this eve'. If it's someone on here,one of your rear parking lights are out! Don't need to give the Rozzers any more excuses to pull over a modded 'Line...

So:you all get the issue? Those that have,whadda ya reckon:horn or what?!?

So...anyone on here know this car?

Ah,bugger. I just knew I had it wrong. I always thought it was a combination of vehicle and driver/rider;looks like I was mistaken,LOL! So the sticker,now we're back on topic,should read "The right man for the job...is a woman"? Spotted that on the back of a very-well steered Evo 9 at Wakefield!

Click on link and play away http://www.107.peugeot.co.uk/peugeot.swf

Sorry, my bad. Yes,I've been a long term subscriber,and I do get issues a bit earlier than the newsagencies. Keep your eyes peeled:it'll be worth the wait! Oh,yes:VSR33,you're a smartarse...lucky you're a funny one,LMAO! (Actually,that Evo is quite horn.It's just overshadowed by a much nicer R32!!)

Likewise:p**sed myself laughing! Good one,Snoozy!

Canberran SAU'ers be proud! Get your butts to whatever newsagent sells High Performance Imports for Issue 67....Trust me:it'll be worth the read! Hint? Who ordered the foot-long with JUN,more JUN and topped with JUN special sauce? Another hint? Try the cover on for size...: So;any ideas yet?Hmm?Hmmmmmm?!?

Nah;thankyou! And yep;it'll be worth the wait!

Sticker I spotted ages ago:" Looking for your cat? Check under my wheels " As for the "us vs. them" sticker thing...each to their own. I reckon let the car do the talking at the track,no stickers=less is more!

I've just finished talking with Matt(_8OO5TED_),and I'm positively stoked with the service and pricing:my little beastie is now insured with Shannons! I was already on a good deal through a friend that owns an Insurance Brokers here in Canberra,but the Shannons deal,as Matt helped me with,was considerably better again! I can't recommend him highly enough. Whilst I'm sure everyone has their own circumstances(and prior convictions,LOL),and may require slightly different things from an insurer,those that haven't already talked to Shannons(and make sure you talk to Matt);you need to!

Can't see why not....

An Air Force F-16 fighter pilot trainee was up on a solo flight, and decided to have some fun with a Southwest 737 airliner. The Air Force jock whizzed his fighter past the airliner, did two loops and shot up vertically and came back down next to the 737 and got on his radio frequency. "Hey there mister airline pilot . . . what do you think of that??" The Southwest pilot responded "That was impressive, mister fighter pilot . . . but watch this." The 737 droned along for about 15 minutes, and then the pilot came back on and said "What did you think about that?" The F-16 pilot asked, "Think about what? What did you do?" The Southwest pilot responded "I got up, stretched my legs, went to the back, poured a cup of coffee, took a piss, got a layover date with the flight attendant with the biggest tits, and strolled back to the cockpit. Any questions??"

Reviewed this quote now two weeks later...nope;still doesn't make sense.... I'm almost embarassed that I want to pull down such a great example of Nissan's finest that's running so well...

Jason at Infinity Signs has the template from memory!

Three dead bodies turn up at the mortuary, all with very big smiles on their faces. The coroner calls the police to tell them what has happened. "First body: Frenchman, 60, died of heart failure while making love to his mistress. Hence the enormous smile, Inspector," says the Coroner. "Second body: Scotsman, 25, won a thousand pounds on the lottery, spent it all on whiskey. Died of alcohol poisoning, hence the smile." The Inspector asked, "What of the third body?" "Ah," says the coroner, "this is the most unusual one. Billy-Bob from Oklahoma, 30, struck by lightning." "Why is he smiling then?" inquires the Inspector. "Thought he was having his picture taken."