Jump to content
SAU Community

Recommended Posts

Subject: cOnS vX GTS300 vS HaBiBs R33 sKyLiNe[tRuE StOrY]

>

>

> After the race between My Cousins VL vs My Brothers Friends VL we pulled

> up at Muzzatech Performance in Coburg and we see Con there. Because I'm

> such good friends with Con I yell "Yalla Re how u go Bro" Con didn't

> answer me maybe he didn't see me.....because I'm such good friends with

> him he shoulda recognized me.

>

> So me and Spiro park our 6 second VL in a disabled parking spot cause

> Spiro is on workers comp and hurt his back lifting bricks. So we go inside

> to Con and ask

> "Do you sell da boost bro" Con goes Na bro but I got a VX GTS 300kw.

>

> Then Spiro goes V8's are shiit re...my cousins Skyline will rip it up.

> So we tell Spiros cousin to come down and have a race down Nicholson

> St.....he says the tram track give better traction for dragging.

>

> I know from my uncle that the Holden GTS is the fastest car that Holden

> has built its got 300kw so it can beat Ferraris cause its a V8 with 300kw

> and that it can beat all the Jap cars cause they only got 206kw....the GTS

> has 300kw so its much much faster and also the car has more than 300kw

> cause con fitted a exhaust so its got more like 450kw but con doesn't like

> to brag about how good his exhaust is.

>

> Soon Spiro's mate Habib rocks up with the R33. It has over 1000HP using

> stock internals. Habibs R33 is the 3.3 Liter version. The R32 only came

> with a 3.2 liter and the R34 a 3.4liter. That's why they are called

> R32-R34.

> Habib has run a 8 second pass using his G-Tech timer which is really

> accurate cause we recalibrated it for the altitude here on Bell St. He has

> stroked his to 5.0 liter and put a home made BOV on to control boost with.

> He also used 20 head gaskets stacked on top of each other to lower the

> comp ratio to 3.0-1.

> Even with his truck turbo and cooler he says it spools by 2000rpm

> Phwooaarr Sik Re it sounds like its mad. Habib has the number plates

> JETJET747 on his skyline cause it's the fastest Skyline in da world and

> deserves those plates. Our connection at the Vic Roads got us 9 letter

> number-plates. If use want des plates u have to speak to Mario from Vic

> Roads he can hook u up wif da plates.

>

> So we go to Nicholson St and cause my uncle is friends with da cops they

> will let us drag all the time....mate its cause we got so many

> connections. So Con has his family in the back of the VX and also his

> trailer cause V8's got so much torque they can drag race up hill with

> trailer and family in da back and still beat Jap cars.

>

> Yassu Re so the lights go green and Con stalls his GTS up to 7000rpm and

> launches at 8000rpm cause he has a Cop chip he can do this. The car does a

> Fullshick burnout and Habib puts his Skyline in drive and goes after

> him.....because Habib's Skyline is so powerful it just wheel-spins until

> 4th gear.......this means it's a really powerful car and really quick.

> Cars that can't do burnouts are slow cause if u race someone and they cant

> do a burnout on launch that means they are very slow.

>

> Wallah back to the race because we are not stupid we race on the tram

> tracks because its safer than anywhere else and its safe enough to reach

> 300kmph. Both cars are now going 140kmph and we haven't even changed into

> 2nd gear yet.... PWOARRR these cars are fast. Re.......we are a little bit

> behind Cons car and I say "Eh bro u gotta beat him quick put in more

> boost" So Habib puts his boost to 5-BAR which is pretty safe cause he has

> a Truck cooler. We start to catch Con and are neck to neck....&^%#! re

> this was getting close. By this stage we were doing 200kmph and if Habib

> lost I would have to bash him so I could impress Con and get him to work

> on my VL for free at mates rates

>

> Soon we hit 300kmph and by that stage we are winning...den my cousin calls

> me on da new Nokia phone. I tell him we are racing and he says he'll meet

> us at da finish line near Metro.

>

> Den I see da finish line and we are just in front and we beat con.....then

> we stop but der is a corner ahead..."sh1t re" I yell. We stop in time but

> con doesn't luckily his Holden GTS has FE2 suspension and he was able to

> take that corner at 150kpmh like the car was on rails.

>

>

> After we stop outside metro and see Con. He said his diff was playing up

> and he missed a gear otherwise he woulda beat us cause his is a 10 sec

> car. Also if he had a Monsta tacho he could of beaten us more easily. Dat

> race was sik though and cause we were such good racers we have been

> offered a job to teach the V8 Supercar drivers how to race properly.

>

> So we go drive round da CBD and dis hot b1tch see Habibs Skyline so I yell

> "Hey bitch get in da car" This pickup line worked so I rooted her in da

> back of da skyline an then had to drop her off cause I had to go visit my

> nonna in time for dinner.

Link to comment
https://www.sau.com.au/forums/topic/16860-vic-joke-of-the-day-rofl/
Share on other sites

Haha - I think Sniffy is right.

It's funny 'cause it's true.

The guy who works in car audio at JB Prahran was telling me about how 'he rolls up to the Maccas on the WWR - sees all these Excels and Mirages' (he has a VL) and lets them hear some 'cooler noise' to show he means business.

I said - you mean a blow off valve? - "No man - coola noise!"

Doesn't Hot4s teach these kiddies anything?

lmao james... did u go...

"ur mums a loser... ur dads a loser... ur a loser... and ur cars a pile of crap"

then show him ur fully sick R33 3.3litre Triple Turbo Quad Cam, Quad Carbie Shkyline GTS?

Haha - yes I do love multi-point fuel injected V6 boxer engines with triple webbers. Such good economy on Shell super Optimax with added unobtainium.

Mind you - I'm pretty bad myself with the 'NissanGTRPower' sticker on the back of the Lada ;)

lol.. i like to annoy people that r like that ahhahah a guy from work use to bag me allways about my commo so i just pushed his buttons buy say fluufy dice made my car go faster and i was gonna get a big holden sticker for the window cause it gave me 30 kws more at the fly wheel hahaha

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now


  • Similar Content

  • Latest Posts

    • Interesting, I haven't read about the issue with oil getting into the speedo in the cluster before. I'll have to take more notice with mine. The speedo on my R32's when I've run factory diff and tyre size have never been accurate as far as I can remember. The non Type-M GTS-t did come with 15" 5 stud wheels and smaller brakes, but that's less than 5% of them.
    • Good to hear the condenser you picked up off my brother worked all good. Do you think there could be an issue with your AC compressor itself or the clutch on it then? I don't know a lot about them so I can't really help but keen to hear what it ends up being. Keep the build thread going man, it's nice to look back on over time.
    • This is a story of my life things, I learned eventually (thanks to someone calling me out) that my enthusiasm for discussing and sharing ideas that it came across as arrogance and I'm like... WTF?!    One thing I'm pretty sure I justifiably pride myself on is knowing that everyone will have things they can teach you, and you're always going to find out that something you think you know turns out wrong - you just don't know what it is until you get there.   Just the bursting enthusiasm that comes with ADHD when you hit something that gives you dopamine dumps can come across like you think everyone else is wrong or don't matter. But yeah, I'm a software engineer by trade and also do tuning in weekends and 100% have long had a reputation for  quickly making connections when resolving problems or forming solutions that I've sometimes had to take people form a long walk from start to end to explain how I ended up where I did when it's seemed "too simple" when I've stated my initial case, and had the "WTF" type reaction when they've realised how much was actually considered haha.   My reward is that I get all the curly problems thrown at me.
    • Wives never seem to find things funny. Especially when they're trying to sleep, and you've found the new funniest thing ever. I've never seen someone be able to get try and be cranky with me, while they're holding back fits of laughter... 😛   Also, I tell mine it's payback anyway. She has BiPolar. So the household can get quite emotionally wild at times 😛
    • I'm not up to date on the latest, but for basic modifications like pod filter, lower springs etc you can get a modification permit at the time of inspection.  For more serious modifications you will need engineering.  Intercoolers used to fall into the mod permit rule but its been a long while since i looked it up.   Either way you will be able to get it registered, just a case of $300 vs $3k . 
×
×
  • Create New...