Your Goriest Injury

[Wardest]

New thread to keep me interested for the day. I wanna read about your most disgusting, bloody, gory injury. Bring the pain!!!

Mine occurred when I was 13 on an end of year school trip to the movies. We went to Maccas in the city for lunch and while sitting on the old fibreglass bench seats they had I tucked my legs underneath a bit. I was wearing shorts and didn’t realise the seat had a small sharp spike sticking out just near the top of my calf. When I stood up in a hurry the spike not only punctured my calf but ripped a 14 centimetre long laceration down toward my ankle. I reckon it was at least 1 cm deep at the top and in no time my shoe filled up with blood which overflowed every time I took a step leaving bloody footprints all the way to the bathroom.

I managed to stop the bleeding with dunny paper and washed out my shoe.

After a painful tram ride back along St Kilda road to school, the nurse patched me up and sent me home. When mum saw it she raced me to the docs for stiches.

The next day she rang the school furious that the teacher hadn’t taken me to hospital.

In hindsight it was a pretty damn huge gash and I’ve still got a nice scar.

A 14 centimetre long rip in 13 yr olds leg is quite impressive.

Needless to say school trips to the movies and maccas were cancelled after that.

[YRL05S]

Playing rugby league in a final, i was in dummy half and i saw a gap and dived for the try line. The reason there was a gap, was that the goal post was between the two blokes. So i dived as hard as i could straight in to the goal post. Scored the try and dislocated my right shoulder, there was about a four or five inch height difference between my shoulders, a doctor put it back in on the field and i played the rest of the game.

As it turns out the Doctor didn't put it back in properly and i can now pop it in and out at will.

[Wardest]

Hey, I bet you have no problem getting out of a straight jacket.

[predator]

Um, mine is pretty gory..

Happened about 2 years ago when i was going for a bike ride (as i do). Was coming down Burke Road towards Kew direction at about 45km.hr (as you do ), when down near the shops there this woman basically cuts right out into the left lane from the right lane.. so of course she can get into that prime spot that she just had to get into at that second.. of course completely oblivious to said rider flying down road (legally mind you) even though she'd just overtaken me. Said rider has to slam on brakes to avoid slamming into dumb old bitch in car..

About the last thing i remember is flying over the handlebars at great speed. Remember sitting there few minutes later with people all standing around going "woa, look at this, you reckon he's alive" (or some such brilliant commentary), me going "er, no, i'm ok" ..then realise i have blood all over myself and everywhere else in abundance. Probably realise at that point i'm not so good afterall. Its probably the same feeling when somebody realises they're actually touching their brain when feeling their head to see why it hurts that little bit.

Ambulance comes. Takes me away. Worse thing is the only time i get to go in abulance i can't remember the ****ing thing !

So anyway, was in hospital for two weeks. Fractured my elbow, kinda rolled when i fell so fractured cheek, about 10 stitches to left side face, chunky lip, took bit of ear out, big chunk outta shoulder, knee, and elsewhere. Benefits were Morphine injections (mmm, fuzzy) and cute young nurses on call at the call of a button. Anybody at the best of times would say this would be pure heaven - but while feeling pretty much in pain constantly not altogether the best. Also: trying to impress said nurses while not really looking the greatest and half your face is swallen up, not the best. Least it was a tough story to tell.

Funiest part: when i'm lying in the emergency entrance on a trolley, some chick pops down my pants to look at my winky - presumably to check whether it was still there, but you know, i could only hope. Then proceeded to cut all my clothes off. Now if only i could have that happen outside of a hospital this would be called "getting lucky"

So well that was that.

moral of the story...beware the cyclist!!

p.s. also note, i, like most cyclists carry a nice set of keys and am not afraid to use them either, and good luck trying to catch an addrenaline pumped cylclist.

[doxximus]

when i was about maybe 6 or 8 running around barefoot at some place and this drunk guy pushes door open, it goes over one foot, almost lose 3 toes

another time was running, accidently kicked marble block and my toenail fell off

[sniffy]

Originally posted by Wardest

Needless to say school trips to the movies and maccas were cancelled after that.

i hate kids like you, ruining it for everyone else!

[predator]

tell us yours sniffy.. come on i visited ya in hospital and everything..

[sniffy]

meh...yours was better!

[YRL05S]

If you want gore, once i had to run my mates left ear to the hospital in a tupperware container so they could reattach it.

Glen was riding his road trail and i was a couple of cars behind him when the lady behind him ran up the arse of him at the lights.

2 years later his back has been fused and various other procedures, he can now walk again, the stupid lady that did it less than 12 months later hit another kid on a BMX when she was yelling at her kids in the back seat.

Anyway how the tupperware come about was the person who's driveway glen landed on was hosing all the blood off and found his ear and gave it to me. I nearly threw up.

[sniffy]

nice! i think we have a winner!

[(B1) MR_fanny]

i dont have a story myself but in high school a friend of mine was riding his bmx and somehow....(still puzzles me to this day) he got his nutsack caught between the rear wheel and the frame where the brakes are. needless to say he ripped a hole in his sacks and had to go to hospital to stitch it up. wats even more funny was the doc that did the stitches was female and he couldnt help crackin a fat...hahaha. ah top bloke, R.I.P Ash

[predator]

so he came across even greater peril later on? man, what a hard life!

[dale]

i had a front doorway sliding thingo that compressed wen u opened it and me bein little my nanny didnt see my fingers through it and she closed it and chopped one of my fingers onto the floor (my left rude finger) and then it fell off and i picked it up and we went to the hospital where the nice man sowed it back on and now i have some lovely scars on my finger luckily i still have it or else id only beable to give one finger to someone. i got to play with toys in hospital

[akeenan]

ive dislocated my knee and because of the huge force it broke both sides of my knee cap. they were floating around the inside of my knee. i got it x-rayed the the guy couldnt believe it. i had surgery the next day and couldnt walk for around 2 months after. that was around 3 years ago and to this day it still hurts especially in the cold weather. oh it also puts me back on crutches now and again and puts a big restriction on my skateboarding

[Jamezilla]

Great thread Ed!

12 years old:

Was pushing my cousin down a hill in a billycart. I let go. He turned sharply and stopped in front of me. I was still 'momentuming' down hill and ran straight into him.

Nice sharp right-angle piece of wood (thanks saftey-grandpa for that little gem) hit my leg and gouged out a 10cm x 2cm gash in my shin - right through all the skin and muscle and stuff - to the bone.

I couldn't feel a thing (torn nerves) and was OK until my cousin (who's now a cop in Perth) poked it with a stick and it made a 'clunk' noise - like the sound of stick hitting bone - then the blood gushed forth like the closing of the Red Sea.

I'd like to say I was brave and dragged myself 20kms though the bush to hospital - but I screamed and mum came

I still have a wonderful 'impress the ladies' type scar and cannot feel a thing in that part of my leg. Lucky I don't need to dial a phone with my shins that often...

[THE CHIEF]

January 3 2000. 3 days into the new millenium.

Was driving to the city with a full car in a little oldskool corolla seca hatch and someone swerved in front of us, we went sideways to the right, then swung sideways to the left (going at 80km mind you) then slammed into the gutter, the car flipped and rolled 6 times!

Mind you where it happened there was hundreds of metres of hugre trees withg a little gap of about 20 metres with no trees. We landed in the gap with no trees (The man above must of been watching out for us) Anyway I crushed my thumb, the window was open and basically my hand hit the ground with the car on top of it crushing my thumb to pieces, the car stopped on its side and the Jaws of life where required to cut all 5 of us out of this. To this day I still have no idea how we survived (especially after seeing the state of the car.. it was ****ed!)

Anyways 2 weeks later on the radio a survey was done saying that if you where in a car accident the most chance of dying would be if you where in a corrolla seca!! How is that for trippy!!

True Story.

[Wardest]

Originally posted by SLYWPN

(The man above must of been watching out for us)  

Lets maintain the reality here everyone. No need to fantisise

[romaniac]

i broke my leg last yr at the beach in phillip island. The ankle twised 180degrees. Had to get airlifted to dandenong hospital. Then they put a metal rod from my knee to my ankle with 6 screws in it. I just got it taken out 3 weeks ago.

heres a pic

[sniffy]

i feel off my bike and scratched my knee...it nearly left a scar! scary stuff!

[clarkey]

Even though this is a great topic Ed I still think you need therapy for actually thinking of it.

Alan