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Inner West Crew Whoretown (toowong/st Lucia/kenmore/indooroopilly And Sometimes Sunnybank?)

funkymonkey

By funkymonkey,
in Queensland

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FineLine
FineLine

Are you allowed to drive a turb on p plates. ?

FineLine
FineLine

They do indeed mate. doesnt matter where you live these days, if its a line its a target. Mine are kept under lock and key.

FineLine
FineLine

Yes Yes! It truly is....If you like long delays and the worst farken traffic in the state.

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Isola Grand Master

Isola

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So... I just had an interesting adventure. As some of you are aware, the Capri was being a fussy little bitch on Thrusday night and lied to me about the fuel situation. It cut out down the street and I said "root it" and walked back up the hill and took the other car. So tonight I figure I'll go and get some fuel and bring it home. What should have been a 10min run down to stafford and back turned into an hour and a half epic journey.

The Caltex at stafford shut their doors so you can't get into the shop between 11 and 5. I forgot. As I came into view of it, I remembered and thought "right... off to ivory coast at Kedron then!" got down there, trotted in, found the jerry cans, bought it, walked to the pump (so far so good ey?) filled the can up and as I screwed the lid on - the god damned funnel dropped off the lip INTO THE BOTTOM OF THE CAN!!! *sigh* paid for the fuel and drove back NEAR to where the Capri was, thinking "if i park halfway back to the house, it's less walking to get back to pick up the Daewoo (in my mind it made perfect sense even though it was complete horseshit :D ). Started the walk down to the Capri (now mind you this was about 100m) half way there "ugh! that car has bright ass headlights" *covering eyes with hand not carrying can of petrol* - - - *BLUE AND RED LIGHT DISCO TIME!!!* SERIOUS?!?! Couldn't even walk 100m without getting stopped by the five oh :P

They did the usual "got any id?" "what are you doing out at this hour?" and of course how could they not ask "what's with the can of fuel?" So i filled them in, that the car ran out of gas blah blah filling it up etc etc yawn boring, please sir can i just go and do it now? So just to make sure I wasn't going to torch the car they wanted to confirm it was mine: did i have the keys? "yes sir i do" can we see you open then door then please? "here you are, open" the usual BS. annnnnnyway - they finally get bored of laughing at me and leave

Now all this while i've been pondering "hmm... do i really need that black pipe... it should be alright to just dump in" fkin WRONG!!! I've never noticed it before, but the fuel access is REALLY deep on a capri. Too deep to just tip the can upside down and hope. So I started to forrage in the two cars to find something funnell worthy (no I couldn't have just gone home and gotten the funnell, because I don't own one) drink bottles looked good, but my keys and pen didn't want to puncture the plastic... what I really needed was a knife or scissors. Now I don't know about you... but i'm not NORMALLY trying to take over a commercial airliner and aim it at a building, so 99% of the time, i'm not carrying a random blade. I tried everything - jumper lead clamps, tyre iron, spanner, it was just stupid. then I thought... hmmm there HAS to be a lighter in one of these cars.. I smoked for 8 years... SURELY i've left one behind... so i looked and dug and scavanged and finally!!! when i was about to just scream out an epic "KHHHAAAAAANNN!!!" i found one!

So i set about to burning the bottom out of a plastic drink bottle... when my lovely new friends from earlier drive back down the street, obviously heading back from whatever housing commission domestic abuse call they'd been responding to. And there's me, the dude with the can of gasoline... now with a lighter... lit... near a bottle... now i'm SURE that this did NOT in ANY WAY scream Molotov Cocktail to these guys... not at all... :ermm: yet for some reason... they stopped again... :/

"Mr. Harrison..." ....ahhh shit... he remembered my fkn name... "It's not what it looks like! I'm sure you guys hear that a lot... but it's NOT!" He didn't really look too trusting of me at this point... can't say I blame him, lighter in one hand, smoking plastic bottle in the other hand, and a 5L tin of highly flamable liquid at my feet... "So... what is it then? care to enlighten us?" still.. for some reason.. really not trusting me... ME the guy with the lighter and the gas... ME of all people... "ok... the little funnell on the can fell into it, i can't get it out (at this point i refrained from a "that's what she said"... but i was DYING to do it) i need a funnell to fill the car up..."

cop: "so what's with the bottle and the lighter?"

me: "i don't have anything sharp... and i watch far too much macguyver"

cop: "ok, well I don't want to stay here all night, yet i don't want to leave the scene of a can of fuel, and a lighter. it's going to look really bad for me if someone has to bring a big red truck down here with it's lights on, and i didn't report it"

me: "well if you guys have a knife or something i can use instead, i'll hand the lighter over to you, i really don't want to set anything on fire, i just want to take my car home"

cop: "i have a better idea... rather than handing you a blade. I hold onto the fuel, you finish you little funnell there, you give me the lighter, you fill up your car, i give you back the lighter, we both leave"

me: "fine with me"

so i gave him the jerry can, and he fumbled around trying to get the nozzle out while i when all trogdor on the bottle. he couldn't get the nozzle out either. so i held my makeshift funnell into place, tipped up the tin with my other hand, pour, SLIP!..

...jeans and shoes covered in petrol. fun times.

eventually i got the hang of it, and got maybe 2.5 - 3L of the 5L of fuel in the car. The rest of it was ON the car, on me, on the road...

once they were done laughing at me again they took off, i packed up all my shit and took the car home, then walked back down and got the other car, and took it home. then hosed the capri down, then washed myself off.

I have some jeans to clean now :dry: and god knows how i'm going to get the smell of fuel out of my connies :)

what should have been a 10min job...

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Redsuns88 Veteran

Redsuns88

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danski: i actually thought u bidded on that bonnet till i read more clearly :laugh:

sorry thought it was you !... hope it sells mate.

finally have had a day to myself... relaxed all day.. after like 2 hard working nonstop weeks.

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Beelzebub89 Grand Master

Beelzebub89

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lol John thats f**ked. You must be the unluckiest SOB on the planet :laugh:.

Well I had an awesome night at the casino that got cut short by some obnoxious tard that lost all his money to me :) Sorry I didnt make it to 6 am Tristan lol.

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