The Sa Wasteland

[mid life crisis]

a ode too tiger woods

Ode to Tiger Woods….

Tiger Woods, Tiger Woods… running thru the Dell

Tiger Woods, Tiger Woods… better run like hell

Just run like hell mate… run like hell…run like hell.

Now you’re a Sporting hero… who just takes things in your stride

But you’re a ‘horny’ little devil… who likes ‘crumpet’ on the side !

One either side you…. one in front and rear

But you’re a man of Courage…so you wont show no fear!

Seems Elin found your text mate… from that damsel in distress

And that revealing photo…where she forgot to wear her dress!

Then armed with your best 6 iron… She chased you down the street

Straight up that bloody tree mate… just to make the job complete!

Then She whacked you with your club mate … just to let you know

That seeing other Sheila’s… is not the way to go!

Her Mother joined the ‘circus‘…to help her distraught Daughter SHOUT

But when she saw your ‘weapon‘… she swooned and just passed out!

So don’t ever take a Mistress… and never take a Wife

For one or the other… are sure to cause you strife!

Time to see your Lawyer… then go to see your Mum..

Tell ‘em the Story… about why you’re on the run!

Then go see your banker… to hide away your ‘dough‘.

Better do it fast mate… or it will surely go!

Eleven jilted Maidens…all chomping at the bit…

And all of this because… you just loved to squeeze a Tit!

Better get a ‘grip’ Son… eyes back on the ‘ball’

Better get a grip Son.. or else you’ll lose it all!

So now go join a library… never ‘buy another a book‘.

And then when you ‘feel like it‘… just take another one ‘off the hook‘!

I know a place called Langtrees…where the Maidens are all fair

They charge a reasonable rate mate…and they just call it ‘time share’!

Now here’s some good advice Son… that will not spoil your fun

Just tell ‘em you are Gay mate…and that will make ‘em run

Then when they turn on heel… just pinch’ em on the bum

Then nick off down to Langtrees … and have yourself some fun

Then Go Tiger… Go Tiger… Go Tiger… Go… but don’t you let that ‘Jiggy-Jig’ slow!

Reply With Quote

[scandyflick]

so you selling me your rims or not Dave?

need to talk to Decs bout the 5 stud conversion today...

get my number from facebook.

yeah mate, nothings changed in regard to the wheels at this point. ill give you a call on my next day off.

Think I'll get a sticker made up for the back of the Stag: "I'm not with NS.com"

between the blue mesh and the fitment, i dont reckon theyd mistake you for an ns member.

[RubyRS4]

between the blue mesh and the fitment, i dont reckon theyd mistake you for an ns member.

At least I can't be defected for blue mesh or fitment

[Krishy]

Think I'll get a sticker made up for the back of the Stag: "I'm not with NS.com"

can you print me a copy too please roo

[HELSLO]

Just read through the NS.com thread about the cruise, majority make it sound like a totally different cruise, one member even saying "well behaved"

oh well, definitely not attending in the future, quite happy to rock it at the meet point and contribute to what the night was actually about. A vision that is now beyond lost in translation unfortunately.

totally in agreeance here, i copped a defect last night as well (parked next to dave), so again doing nothing wrong just having to deal with teh tools stopping in front of people's houses to do burnouts.

from now on i will be taking numberplates of those tools myself and reporting them, that way when we get to the meet point those are the guys copping the crap not the ones who pulled in, went to subway, and came back to a cop threatening to tow my car away.

my two cents

Cheers Bengi

p.s also debating whether or not to leave the scene for good and join the Largs Bay Bowls Club

[mid life crisis]

gee over the yrs we all know what n.s crusies turn into i honestly dont know why any of you bother too attend them . it always ends up in grief for someone .

if ya roll with wankers its a sure thing the cops wont be far behind and a fair chance they dont care who they sticker .

[BIT SUS]

knowing that cops would be all over these cruises, I did not attend. Every year, around this time, there is a defect blitz. Looks like Regency will be busy in January as usual.

On a side note. 11pm last night i went to the shops after I dropped my girlfriend home, and on the way back, I had a cop follow me for around 500M up North East Road. As soon as he realised I wasnt speeding or doing anything wrong, he proceeded to do a U-turn and follow a Lolux instead. COME ON!

Sleeper Spec FTW.

BITSUS.

Edited December 14, 2009 by BIT SUS

[SLED]

gee over the yrs we all know what n.s crusies turn into i honestly dont know why any of you bother too attend them . it always ends up in grief for someone .

if ya roll with wankers its a sure thing the cops wont be far behind and a fair chance they dont care who they sticker .

absolutely, couldn't of said it better myself you old bugger

[RubyRS4]

totally in agreeance here, i copped a defect last night as well (parked next to dave), so again doing nothing wrong just having to deal with teh tools stopping in front of people's houses to do burnouts.

from now on i will be taking numberplates of those tools myself and reporting them, that way when we get to the meet point those are the guys copping the crap not the ones who pulled in, went to subway, and came back to a cop threatening to tow my car away.

my two cents

Cheers Bengi

p.s also debating whether or not to leave the scene for good and join the Largs Bay Bowls Club

Do it!

Idiots like that do because they think as long as no cop sees them doing it, they'll get away with it. Now if they had "real car enthusiasts" busting them to the cops, that'd really keep them on their toes (we'd hope) and reduce this kind of behaviour. Even better, they'll avoid cruises like this and leave it to the enthusiasts.

Its why I attend mostly meets than cruises. If I see the slightest hoon attitude, I bail and go home and avoid the cruise. Car has no defect and I have a beer in my hand watching telly.

[Dohmar]

Do it!

Its why I attend mostly meets than cruises. If I see the slightest hoon attitude, I bail and go home and avoid the cruise. Car has no defect and I have a beer in my hand watching telly.

Precisely... if u wanna go for a nice drive, get a couple sensible mates to go with, its much better than having idiots put the public at risk by driving on the wrong side of the road... some of you may remember the crash that happened several years ago which was a skyline crashing headon into a hatchback - madaz was there (I was not) and Im sure he can attest that a repeat performance would be dreadful

its all fun and games until someone loses an eye/limb/life

-D

[DamageInc]

Precisely... if u wanna go for a nice drive, get a couple sensible mates to go with, its much better than having idiots put the public at risk by driving on the wrong side of the road... some of you may remember the crash that happened several years ago which was a skyline crashing headon into a hatchback - madaz was there (I was not) and Im sure he can attest that a repeat performance would be dreadful

its all fun and games until someone loses an eye/limb/life

-D

you cant even do that!

me and a mate went for a drive through piccadily , crafers , mt lofty and got pulled over and ABUSED for owning a skyline.

i wasnt even speeding or cutting lanes , OR driving fast, i was simply driving the road.

if i cant drive my car around the local hills in my area without being pulled over and abused then why should i even bother?

i know theres a time and place for everything , which is why i go out to mallala.

GG sapol

[RubyRS4]

When I'm riding with my biker mates, if some newbie rider or other idiot does the wrong thing, they're told there and then to f**k off and don't come back. In my 9 years or so riding with the same guys, and various guys coming and going from the group, we stand by this rule and no one has brought the wrong attention (sapol etc) down upon us for no reason. I've done it myself where I've removed the keys from the ignition of a rider, told him to f**k off and don't come back. Especially when we found out he had no licence, no rego, and no insurance. We don't need that kind of label.

I've certainly ridden with other groups, and found them to be a pack of hoons and cowboys, who inevitably get screwed over by the cops, and rightly so. I avoid these fools. And the same holds true for car groups.

Perhaps a stricter stance should be taken in the import car enthusiast scene. Speak up there and then ... not on the forum when its too late. Its certainly worked for us bikers. I've certainly had words with a stag owner on one of my cruises from last year.

[Inline 6]

if i cant drive my car around the local hills in my area without being pulled over and abused then why should i even bother?

i know theres a time and place for everything , which is why i go out to mallala.

u need to go further cruise meets at pt lincoln.

speaking of which whos for going camping outa adelaide away from the heat

[Tangles]

gee over the yrs we all know what n.s crusies turn into i honestly dont know why any of you bother too attend them . it always ends up in grief for someone .

if ya roll with wankers its a sure thing the cops wont be far behind and a fair chance they dont care who they sticker .

BINGO

you're all fools for going.

ns is for fools and tools, sorry but that is my opinion.

you'll NEVER see me on a NS-organised cruise

if you want an awesome cruise with zero attention from others (law, public) then speak to me and I can advise some amazing 2-300km routes thru the southern hills

very safe very fast but most enjoyable too.

[Damo_R34]

BINGO

you're all fools for going.

ns is for fools and tools, sorry but that is my opinion.

you'll NEVER see me on a NS-organised cruise

if you want an awesome cruise with zero attention from others (law, public) then speak to me and I can advise some amazing 2-300km routes thru the southern hills

very safe very fast but most enjoyable too.

The greater majority of those complaining about the cops being there are not on this forum, no one here is whinging that cops rocked up, i knew there would be some along the way. The whole point is shit got out of hand in some groups at some parts of the hills, i.e corkscrew, and the cops were alerted, caught up with one group, then he brought his buddies down, doing their job. Sitting on the corkscrew doing burnouts is not only dangerous, pointless and reckless, its completely f**king stupid.

the WHOLE disappointment of the cruise was the lack of an intelligent driver behind the wheel of some cars. Ok, granted, it was an NS.com cruise and everyone knows a bit of reckless shit happens sometimes, but from my perspective, it got way too out of hand real, real quick. Otherwise, it would have been a great cruise for a great cause, with no problems, and you wouldnt be calling us all fools I have been on a few NS.com cruises now, and people have done some stupid shit, but nothing to the level i witnessed yesterday. No disrespect, but i dont know why im a fool for attending.

It doesnt matter whether the olds or your grandmother organised the cruise, you can have a bunch of awesome guys with awesome cars doing some hills runs and raising money for charity, it only takes one skid (on purpose or not) or loud exhaust to alert locals and they WILL contact the police, Mike Rann has flooded the media with so much hoon bs that each and every supporter of him is now sick of "hoons", whether they have ever witnessed hoon activity (loosely defined) or not.

Mark has now created a thread in the SA section of NS asking the community for a solution to this problem. He obviously believes some of the track cars/drift oriented drivers are to blame for the skids and stupid behaviour. I dont know of the solution, but i can guarantee you, the BSM cruise will have a huge amount of cars, some will get defected, taken back to stock, regency, then back on the road with their former un ADR approved modifications. Its the, as Dave has said before, loose nut behind the steering wheel who needs to grow the f**k up.

Then JAck and Jill went tumbling down the hill with an ADR approved bucket, and we all lived happily ever after.

The end.

[Inline 6]

btw has anyone actually had there car towed away by cops when they waiting to defect ya?

just curious how it works, where they tow it etc. would it get impounded? i mean what if you just had your car parked there working at the pizza joint or something when they all showed up.

[mid life crisis]

A woman meets a man in a bar.

They talk; they connect; they end

up leaving together.

They get back to his place,

and as he shows her around his

apartment.

She notices that one wall of his

bedroom is

completely filled with soft, sweet,

cuddly teddy bears.

There are three shelves in the

bedroom,

with hundreds and hundreds of cute,

cuddly teddy bears carefully placed

in rows, covering the entire wall!

It was obvious that he had taken

quite some time to lovingly arrange them

and she was immediately touched

by the amount of thought he had

put into organizing the display.

There were small bears all along

the bottom shelf,

medium-sized bears covering the

length of the middle shelf,

and huge, enormous bears running

all the way along the top shelf.

She found it strange for an

obviously masculine guy

to have such a large collection of

Teddy Bears,

She is quite impressed by his

sensitive side.

but doesn't mention this to him.

They share a bottle of wine and

continue talking and,

after awhile, she finds herself

thinking,

'Oh my God! Maybe, this guy

could be the one!

Maybe he could be the future

father of my children?'

She turns to him and kisses him

lightly on the lips

He responds warmly.

They continue to kiss, the passion

builds,

and he romantically lifts her in

his arms and carries her into his bedroom

where they rip off each other's

clothes and make hot, steamy love.

She is so overwhelmed that she

responds with more passion,

more creativity, more heat than she

has ever known.

After an intense, explosive night

of raw passion with this sensitive guy,

they are lying there together in

the afterglow.

The woman rolls over, gently

strokes his chest and asks coyly,

'Well,how was it?'

The guy gently smiles at her,

strokes her cheek,

looks deeply into her eyes,

and says:

"Help yourself to any prize

from the middle shelf"

[Dohmar]

you cant even do that!

me and a mate went for a drive through piccadily , crafers , mt lofty and got pulled over and ABUSED for owning a skyline.

while this is going to sound harsh, I daresay the mismatched/carbon fiber bonnet look contributes a lot to that - your car stands out and they will pull you over. Once they realise that you're a young man too, then you'll be fitting the classic yob stereotype (again no offence because I know you're not a yob, there is a demographic however...)

I've been pulled over 3 times in 3 years, each time its just a quick breatho and licence/rego check. I can honestly say I've never had an issue with any of the police who've pulled me over, who've been very professional and courteous - one even asked me if I get much negative attention from SAPOL and the answer was no... its not to say that there arent cops who have a bad day, or jump to conclusions, however I've never had an issue. Maybe its cos my car is white, or that I'm older and fatter than you (which police love cause it means they know they wont have to jump fences to catch me) but there it is... if I'm unfortunate to get someone with attitude, well, I know what steps I need to take to ensure their job is carried out to the proper standards.

the irony is that I'm probably pulling the same amount of power as you and my car is older...

and damo, I don't think tangles was implying that you're stupid, however given that the NS crowd are often a bunch of tossers, if you go on an NS cruise you're likely to get tarred with the same brush. Its sad that it happens as Mark has everyone's best interests at heart and its simply a bunch of dickheads that are spoiling it for the sensible ones. And +1 to the idea of taking down registration... I myself will be buying one of these http://www.vsport.com.au/ecommerce/index.php?productID=362 and mounting it in my car to record my 'pleasant country drive'.... if any dickhead starts doing doughnuts or driving like a tool, I'd be quite happy to provide SAPOL with the video evidence.

-D

[Damo_R34]

lol yeah i kinda went off an tangents as things came to my mind.

The basic point i was getting at was there wouldnt have been as many/if any cops at the end point if some idiots could keep their right foot under control.

[skwiz]

Think I'll get a sticker made up for the back of the Stag: "I'm not with NS.com"

Gold!

Group Buy?