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Vic Wasteland Thread

R31Nismoid

By R31Nismoid,
in Victoria

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joeyjoejoejuniorshabadoo
joeyjoejoejuniorshabadoo

probably worth more than your D1R's

Mohsen
Mohsen

i kinda want one. name him al pacacino.

Birds
Birds

You laugh now, but when I'm at a formal occasion with a shitty DJ and they need someone to drop Dre beats...I have something up my sleeve.

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emts Grand Master

emts

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Posted

What happend to Australia being proud of the fact of chopping down tall poppies.

He basically making fun of the fact that this tough as footballer has an issue about a smart arse comment (that I don;t see as racist more a pointer than more brawn than brain) that a 13 yo girl makes.

we have got far far too PC

Leroy Peterson Grand Master

Leroy Peterson

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the fact you guys are getting so worked up about it is also part of the problem that fuels the media. The more people realise that half the stuff they digest isnt news or remotely engaging, the closer we are to getting more real news out of the reporters.

I just find it odd that you're like "man the fark up man the fark up hit the karnt" which is not that far removed from the slander that gets thrown around at the grounds that influenced the lass. If it bothers you how much he got worked up by it, then why are you bothering to get so worked up about it? A girl got a slap on the wrist, Eddie Maguire lost all hopes of signing onto another radio station, everybody wins. Now lets have a coke and a smile and shut the fcuk up.

TiTAN Grand Master

TiTAN

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Posted

I used to get people banging on about the drift ones at Autobarn all the time... Because there is a magnet in them.

I would tell them it's just a gimmick cos if your magnet is covered in metal, it's clearly too late anyway, but for some reason they would still "need" to have it lol

K&N is worse.... That shit is soooooo overpriced but if someone wants it there is NO changing their minds.

i have 3 k&n pod filters, you jealous? 4.5" mouth, 4" mouth and 3" mouth.

TiTAN Grand Master

TiTAN

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Posted

i'd say it's more likely from executives and public sector employees etc.

if it was the mines lifting aust then WA would have the highest average, however it's currently Canberra @ $85k

its the pubes, they get paid a fortune to do nothing and they cant even do that well, also they pay contractors massively, 100+ if you are specialized in something they want, and if there aren't many you can bend them over backwards for more.

alas i do not make anywhere near that :(

ARTZ Grand Master

ARTZ

Posted
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the fact you guys are getting so worked up about it is also part of the problem that fuels the media. The more people realise that half the stuff they digest isnt news or remotely engaging, the closer we are to getting more real news out of the reporters.

this....

they will beat the horse till its well and truely dead, but nothing more will come of it...

I honestly dgaf i dont even know what happened, something about eddie and racist remarks...

this is why i dont bother watching the news...its mostly dribble

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TiTAN Grand Master

TiTAN

Posted
Posted

from wasteland lulz thread.

WARNING!!! Don't Shave That Hair!!!
I have recently made a mistake in my life, and I offer my story to you, that you may learn from my error. It all started, as many things do, with me having trouble shitting.

No, I was not constipated; this was not a regularity problem but a matter of technique. It seems my ass-hair had grown to such a length that tiny grogans were constantly getting tied up in the matted jungle between my asscheeks. It led to much frustration, with me KNOWING that I still had something to drop, but unable to shake the tenacious turd loose from its butthair dwelling. Eventually I would have to do two things: either reach down with some paper and try to pinch off the lingering loaf (which required careful precision to avoid smearing the creature all over my rear, especially since I had no way of seeing what I was doing) or just go for broke, start wiping, and hope that I could remove all the leftover fecal matter before the toilet paper reached its Can't-Be-Flushed threshold.

I was contemplating this problem, when I had what seemed at the time to be a bright idea. "Hey! This is my butt and my butt-hair, right? So why don't I just eliminate all the hair, and then my grogans will flow out like beer from a keg!" I said to myself. It is a statement that will go down in history with a lot of other regretted statements. "How many Indians could there be?" said by General Custer. "Looks like a good day for a drive!" by JFK. "There! America On-Line now has complete Usenet access!" by some idiot system tech. Such was my anal shaving idea.

I performed the operation that night, with a cheap disposable razor and a towel to sit on. Starting from the bottom, and shaving from the crack to the cheeks, I began the arduous process of ridding my ass of hair. Occassionally, I would have to clean the razor of accumulated hair and miscellaneous slime, which I did by wiping it on the towel. Slowly, my twin mounds and the between-ravine began to resemble the hairless cheeks of a newborn baby. Finally, I wiped the razor one last time, and surveyed my work. The towel was covered with a pile of hair. My ass was smooth as ivory. I smiled, satisfied, thinking my troubles were over.

Little did I know.

I now have a great respect for anal-hair. Like everything in this world God created, it has its mighty purpose in existence. It was only after I had removed it that I started to learn how much I had been taking it for granted. For one, it provides friction. I learned this the next day, when I walked out into the sun heading for class. After climbing two flights of stairs and starting to sweat, I started to notice something unpleasant. The sweat was accumulating in my crack, and was causing the unpleasant sensation of my two asscheeks sliding past each other with every step. I thought about going to the bathroom and wiping it off, but had to get to class. Eventually, I thought, it would dry.

Unfortunately, it did dry, but only after mingling with the microscopic shit- molecules lingering around my brown starfish. When I stood up after class, my cheeks were stuck together with a slimy sticky shit/sweat combination. As I made my way back to my dorm, it started to itch. God-DAMN, did it itch! Felt like a swarm of ants was making its way up and down my crack. Fighting to keep from jamming my hand down there and scratching away, I rushed back to the dorm.

Unfortunately again, this exertion caused me to sweat, and when I finally reached my room, my cheeks were sliding back and forth against each other like a pair of horny cane-toads. I quickly dropped my pants, and attempted to dry my ass off by sticking it in front of a fan and spreading my cheeks. As I pulled the two mounds of flesh apart, a horrible stench burst free and filled the room. Every dog within a 4 block radius started to howl. I had it worst of all, as the ripe aroma of festering shit/sweat went into the fan and blew back into my face. I fought to keep from heaving. And as I sat there, fighting vomit, my ass cheeks spread and dripping, with the concentrated aroma of my body odor mixed with the tangy smell of my own shit blowing right into my face, I had only one thought: "It will be like this until the hair grows back. Weeks."

Later on, trying to deal as best I could, wiping my ass at every opportunity, I discovered another wonderful use for ass-hair - ventilation. I attempted to launch a fart, only to have it get stuck between my asscheeks. Apparently, with no hair, the two pink twins can get vacuum sealed together, and the result was a frustrating fart that slid up and down between my cheeks like a lost gerbil.

As if that wasn't enough, I am now enduring further torture. As anyone who has ever shaved anything knows, when hair is first growing in, it comes in as stubble. Imagine your ass having the texture of a brillo pad. Well, that is what I am dealing with now. It is a hellish torture, and there are many times when I just look out the window and contemplate why I shouldn't just jump out and get it all over with in one fleshy splat, rather than endure this constant agony.

Friends, DON'T SHAVE YOUR ASS-HAIR!
Odium Grand Master

Odium

Posted
Posted

from the wasteland thread

I dont mind the ol repost... i'm sure.. hell i KNOW I am guilty of that... but that one has been around for at least a decade now... there's reposts and there's reposts :P

Sunkist Grand Master

Sunkist

Posted
Posted

just because you have seen the entire internet Hamish, doesn't mean the rest of us have.

In time you will, as the other Victorians have, get used to Hamish hating absolutely everything that was not initially spoken of, or better created by himself

kaitoukid Veteran

kaitoukid

Posted
Posted

settle down mr chef!

----------------

& also lol Alvin, I handed in my last assessment due on Tuesday night... and that was for an Arts subject. This semester has been alright assessment wise... but just means everything will be riding on exams, fffuuu.

Haha nice sig also.

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